Autism Asperger- (ish) Tips for communicating with adults
Trouble communicating with someone who seems to have a bit of autism or aspergers? I got a call from an old friend who works in the financial industry. He said he had a client, who he thought might be on the autism spectrum, and he wanted tips on how to communicate effectively with his client.
Right off the bat, I’d say, be very explicit. Don’t say “you know,” or “all that,” don’t assume they will automatically infer what you mean. Do ask them how they think important aspects of a transaction will work, and what consequences they might expect for their choices, so you know what they are thinking and expecting.
Understand that once they have learned a pattern, or have an understanding of some aspect of the relevant business transaction, even if it is not correct and you point it out, they may have difficulty inhibiting a previously learned pattern or expectation to create a new more accurate understanding in it’s place. You need to be patient, very explicit, stick to the facts, and ensure they really get what you want to convey. Again, you can accomplish this by asking them what their understanding is to make sure they are telling you back what you want them to get.
I would also say, don’t be afraid to be blunt, very direct, and completely honest. You can expect they likely will communicate with you in the same way, and will appreciate your candor.
Don’t take what they say as they are working through something they don’t like or would prefer not to accept personally. Try to put your feelings aside and know this may be difficult for them, they may be very focused on what they want and how they want things to work, and miss considering how what they say may affect how you feel.
I think it would be great to get feedback from other professionals and adults who consider themselves as being on the autistic spectrum to gain insight and add their comments to this post.
While I’m at it, I am going to create another post to address what teachers need to know when they have a kid on the autism spectrum, to create a one to three page cheat sheet of what to expect and how to work successfully with their new student. I wrote a book on the topic, but it came out to around 150 pages, and I know most teachers, and people in the business industry, likely don’t have time to read that much, they might need something quick and boiled down, if such a thing is possible. I’ll see what I can do, and coordinate feedback on this topic too, synthesizing the feedback I get.
I want to create healthy happy life
It can be hard to work with a mind that keeps going to the problems and worries. It's time to teach children their power over thoughts and feelings.
I would like teachable exercises for; replacing thoughts that are not helpful, reasonable, or true, creating joy and emotional resilience, Mindgarden metaphor illustrating power and choice in thoughts, Dream Book strategy for identifying clear goals and building motivation, a video explaining how NOT to let others or situations have the power to bring you down!